remaking my list.

my heart has been broken, more than once.
ive been torn apart, on more than one occasion.
and its taken a while to get my heart to where it is now.

im done believing the lies poured into my head.
im done being this little worried insecure girl.
it is in Christ where i find my strength and my self image.
for He is the One who will never hurt me, who will never let me down.

i know what i want.
i know what i deserve.

dear mr whoever you are,
im trying to be patient.
but i just want to know who you are now.
i cant wait until i finally know.
until everything in my life finally all comes together.
i love you my dear.
xoxo...your girl.

thought:: i cannot settle.
dream:: perfection.
hope:: patience, so i do not mess up again.
inspiration:: the present, my future.

dont let the bedbugs bite.

so many dreams, more like nightmares.
every night when i lay down i close my eyes in the hope that they will go away.
but they have yet to leave. every night, in my dream, im in a different place at a different time of day around different people...well for the most part.
theres one person who's always there.
the dream may start nicely, but then it gets worse and worse.
continuing to go downhill until i wake up in fear, tears, or embarrassment.
all of these nightmares run through my head as i try to figure out why theyre there in the first place. i need them to go away. they have to go away.

to my nightmares,
go away. let me be.
i cant have you sticking around.
my mind is meant to be filled with peace,
not your crazyness. so leave.
xoxo...the dreamer.

thought::i need sleep. good sleep.
dream::end to the nightmares.
hope::peace and rest.
inspiration::my mind and the stories in it.